Har du angst for å bli alene-mor?

[AnonymBruker]

Det har jeg. Tenk så nedverdigende at mannen bare stikker av, også sitter du igjen med alt ansvar og økonomiske problemer. I tillegg har  veldig mange norske menn et stort hat mot alenemødre og jeg tror ikke jeg hadde orket den skammen og alle stygge kommentarer. Derfor holder jeg meg unna menn for jeg har sånn angst for å bli forlatt. 

Flere som tenker sånn? 

Anonymkode: 1ae18...2eb

[AnonymBruker]

I tillegg er far viktigst for barnet under oppveksten.

Anonymkode: b9d3f...9c3

[Pal Fungi]

Jeg har valgt å være frivillig barnløs. 

[AnonymBruker]

Jeg har mer angst for å ende opp som en av dem som bruker unødvendige bindestreker. Holder meg våken om natten, faktisk.

Anonymkode: 1493d...be9

[AnonymBruker]

3 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

 

I tillegg er far viktigst for barnet under oppveksten.

Anonymkode: b9d3f...9c3

😂 Både mor og far er like viktige. 

Anonymkode: c13a5...eba

[FrøkenMånestråle]

Ingen angst her, lykkelig alenemamma som klarer seg bra både økonomisk og med alt ansvar. Kunne ikke hatt det bedre. 😊

Noe hat bortsett fra på kg da har jeg heller ikke lagt merke til. 

[AnonymBruker]

Nei, det har jeg da ikke?

Selvsagt ville jeg blitt knust hvis mannen min døde eller forlot meg, men jeg har vært alene med tre barn fra 0-5 og i flere år framover, med dårlig økonomi og hele pakka. Slitsomt, men jeg sto i det og gjorde en kjempejobb, og derfor vet jeg at jeg vil klare meg på egne bein hvis noe skulle skje med forholdet eller mannen min fremover også.

Så nei, finnes ikke redd her.

Anonymkode: d5b93...051

[AnonymBruker]

Ingen angst. Jeg dro fra barnefar, og har ikke angret en eneste dag på det. Eneste jeg angrer på, er at jeg ikke dro tidligere!

 

6 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

mange norske menn et stort hat mot alenemødre og jeg tror ikke jeg hadde orket den skammen og alle stygge kommentarer.

Å? Det merker jeg ikke noe til andre steder enn her på KG.

Hvilken skam snakker du om??

Anonymkode: 630ed...811

[AnonymBruker]

3 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

 

Jeg har mer angst for å ende opp som en av dem som bruker unødvendige bindestreker. Holder meg våken om natten, faktisk.

Anonymkode: 1493d...be9

Har du OCD?

Anonymkode: 1ae18...2eb

[AnonymBruker]

2 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

😂 Både mor og far er like viktige. 

Anonymkode: c13a5...eba

Infants of highly involved fathers, as measured by amount of interaction, including higher levels of play and caregiving activities, are more cognitively competent at 6 months and score higher on the Bayley Scales of Infant Development (Pedersen, Rubinstein, & Yarrow, 1979; Pedersen, Anderson, & Kain, 1980). By one year they continue to have higher cognitive functioning (Nugent, 1991), are better problem solvers as toddlers (Easterbrooks & Goldberg, 1984), and have higher IQ’s by age three (Yogman, Kindlan, & Earls, 1995). When compared with mothers, fathers’ talk with toddlers is characterized by more wh- (e.g. “what”, where” etc.) questions, which requires children to assume more communicative responsibility in the interaction. This encouraged toddlers to talk more, use more diverse vocabulary, and produce longer utterances when interacting with their fathers (Rowe, Cocker, & Pan, 2004).

School aged children of involved fathers are also better academic achievers. They are more likely to get A’s (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001), have better quantitative and verbal skills (Bing, 1963; Goldstein, 1982; Radin, 1982), have higher grade point averages, get better achievement test scores, receive superior grades, perform a year above their expected age level on academic tests, obtain higher scores on reading achievement, or learn more and perform better in school (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Blanchard & Biller, 1971; Cooksey & Fondell, 1996; Feldman & Wentzel, 1990; Gadsen & Ray, 2003; Goldstein, 1982; Gottfried, Gottfried, & Bathurst, 1988; Howard, Lefever, Borkowski, & Whitman, 2006; McBride et al., 2005; McBride, Schoppe-Sullivan, & 2005; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Shinn, 1978; Snarey 1993; Wentzel & Feldman, 1993). Children of involved fathers are also more likely to live in cognitively stimulating homes (William, 1997). A father’s academic support was positively related to adolescent boys’ academic motivation to try hard in school, feel their grades were important, and to place a high value on education (Alfaro, Umana-Taylor, & Bamaca, 2006). Father contact was also associated with better socioemotional and academic functioning in school related areas for children with single or married adolescent mothers (Howard et al., 2006).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to demonstrate more cognitive competence on standardized intellectual assessments (Lamb 1987; Radin 1994) and have higher IQ’s (Gottfried et al., 1988; Honzik, 1967; Radin 1972; Shinn, 1978).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to enjoy school (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997), have positive attitudes toward school (Flouri, Buchanan, & Bream, 2002; Flouri, 2005), participate in extracurricular activities, and graduate. They are also less likely to fail a grade, have poor attendance, be suspended or expelled, or have behaviour problems at school, (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Brown & Rife, 1991; Mosley & Thompson, 1995; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001; William, 1997). In addition, Zimmerman, Slaem, and Notaro (2000) found that positive paternal engagement in 10th grade predicted fewer problem behaviors in 11th grade.

Children of involved fathers are more likely to have higher levels of economic and educational achievement, career success, occupational competency, better educational outcomes, higher educational expectations, higher educational attainment, and psychological well being (Amato, 1994; Barber & Thomas, 1986; Barnett, Marshall, & Pleck, 1992a; Bell, 1969; Flouri, 2005; Furstenberg & Harris, 1993; Harris, Furstenberg, & Marmer, 1998; Lozoff, 1974; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Snarey, 1993). More recently, Flouri and Buchanan (2004) found that father and mother involvement at age 7 independently predicted educational attainment by age 20 for both sons and daughters indicating that early father involvement can be another protective factor in counteracting risk conditions that might lead to later low attainment levels.
http://www.fira.ca/cms/documents/29/Effects_of_Father_Involvement.pdf

Det er ekstremt viktig for barn å ha en far. Faktisk viser det seg at faren er viktigere for barnas utvikling enn moren er. Kanskje fordi moren bare er opptatt av følelser, i mens menn er mer opptatt av prestasjon? Uansett vil det være skadelig for barn å vokse opp med en alenemor. 

Anonymkode: b9d3f...9c3

[AnonymBruker]

Jeg er veldig redd for å bli alenemor, ja. Min samboer er alvorlig syk, og jeg er livredd for at han skal dø fra barna og meg.

Skam fordi et forhold tar slutt? Nei.

Anonymkode: c5f44...a3f

[AnonymBruker]

Angst har jeg ikke, men det ville vært fryktelig kjipt. Først og fremst fordi jeg ikke har råd til å eie bolig alene og leiemarkedet er sprengt her vi bor, så det ville vært veldig usikkert om jeg klarte å finne noe innenfor samme skolekrets. Skrekken er at vi da ender opp med å måtte flytte rundt med skolebytte og det hele flere ganger. (Mannen har heller ikke råd til å eie alene, ellers hadde løsningen vært å la ham ha hovedomsorgen.)

Hadde det ikke vært for akkurat dette så hadde det ikke bekymret meg å bli alenemor. Sånn hvis vi ser bort fra kjærlighetssorg og de greiene da. 😛

Anonymkode: eb24b...618

[AnonymBruker]

Nei, har aldri hatt angst for det 🙂

Anonymkode: 5d690...b12

[AnonymBruker]

Ja det må jeg innrømme at jeg har. Virker som at mange menn tror at å få barn bare er en lek og ikke noe de gidder å prioritere ansvaret for. Her inne ser vi jo menn som kjemper for juridisk abort altså fraskrivelse av barnet og det er skremmende at det fins sånne holdninger blandt menn. Mener at menn som ikke vil ha ansvar for et barn får sterilisere seg eller i det minste bruke kondom, helst avstå helt fra sex.  

Anonymkode: 5b2f4...9ea

[AnonymBruker]

14 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

 

Jeg har mer angst for å ende opp som en av dem som bruker unødvendige bindestreker. Holder meg våken om natten, faktisk.

Anonymkode: 1493d...be9

The horror! 😨

Anonymkode: 68ee2...f4d

[AnonymBruker]

9 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

 

Infants of highly involved fathers, as measured by amount of interaction, including higher levels of play and caregiving activities, are more cognitively competent at 6 months and score higher on the Bayley Scales of Infant Development (Pedersen, Rubinstein, & Yarrow, 1979; Pedersen, Anderson, & Kain, 1980). By one year they continue to have higher cognitive functioning (Nugent, 1991), are better problem solvers as toddlers (Easterbrooks & Goldberg, 1984), and have higher IQ’s by age three (Yogman, Kindlan, & Earls, 1995). When compared with mothers, fathers’ talk with toddlers is characterized by more wh- (e.g. “what”, where” etc.) questions, which requires children to assume more communicative responsibility in the interaction. This encouraged toddlers to talk more, use more diverse vocabulary, and produce longer utterances when interacting with their fathers (Rowe, Cocker, & Pan, 2004).

School aged children of involved fathers are also better academic achievers. They are more likely to get A’s (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001), have better quantitative and verbal skills (Bing, 1963; Goldstein, 1982; Radin, 1982), have higher grade point averages, get better achievement test scores, receive superior grades, perform a year above their expected age level on academic tests, obtain higher scores on reading achievement, or learn more and perform better in school (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Blanchard & Biller, 1971; Cooksey & Fondell, 1996; Feldman & Wentzel, 1990; Gadsen & Ray, 2003; Goldstein, 1982; Gottfried, Gottfried, & Bathurst, 1988; Howard, Lefever, Borkowski, & Whitman, 2006; McBride et al., 2005; McBride, Schoppe-Sullivan, & 2005; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Shinn, 1978; Snarey 1993; Wentzel & Feldman, 1993). Children of involved fathers are also more likely to live in cognitively stimulating homes (William, 1997). A father’s academic support was positively related to adolescent boys’ academic motivation to try hard in school, feel their grades were important, and to place a high value on education (Alfaro, Umana-Taylor, & Bamaca, 2006). Father contact was also associated with better socioemotional and academic functioning in school related areas for children with single or married adolescent mothers (Howard et al., 2006).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to demonstrate more cognitive competence on standardized intellectual assessments (Lamb 1987; Radin 1994) and have higher IQ’s (Gottfried et al., 1988; Honzik, 1967; Radin 1972; Shinn, 1978).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to enjoy school (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997), have positive attitudes toward school (Flouri, Buchanan, & Bream, 2002; Flouri, 2005), participate in extracurricular activities, and graduate. They are also less likely to fail a grade, have poor attendance, be suspended or expelled, or have behaviour problems at school, (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Brown & Rife, 1991; Mosley & Thompson, 1995; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001; William, 1997). In addition, Zimmerman, Slaem, and Notaro (2000) found that positive paternal engagement in 10th grade predicted fewer problem behaviors in 11th grade.

Children of involved fathers are more likely to have higher levels of economic and educational achievement, career success, occupational competency, better educational outcomes, higher educational expectations, higher educational attainment, and psychological well being (Amato, 1994; Barber & Thomas, 1986; Barnett, Marshall, & Pleck, 1992a; Bell, 1969; Flouri, 2005; Furstenberg & Harris, 1993; Harris, Furstenberg, & Marmer, 1998; Lozoff, 1974; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Snarey, 1993). More recently, Flouri and Buchanan (2004) found that father and mother involvement at age 7 independently predicted educational attainment by age 20 for both sons and daughters indicating that early father involvement can be another protective factor in counteracting risk conditions that might lead to later low attainment levels.
http://www.fira.ca/cms/documents/29/Effects_of_Father_Involvement.pdf

Det er ekstremt viktig for barn å ha en far. Faktisk viser det seg at faren er viktigere for barnas utvikling enn moren er. Kanskje fordi moren bare er opptatt av følelser, i mens menn er mer opptatt av prestasjon? Uansett vil det være skadelig for barn å vokse opp med en alenemor. 

Anonymkode: b9d3f...9c3

Morsomt 😂 Du vet at menn også er forskjellige? Ikke alle som er like greie å vokse opp med skjønner du. Venninna mi tok mer skade av å vokse opp med faren, hun har utviklet sosial angst etter måten han var i oppveksten, veldig streng og ufølsom. Hun drømte alltid om at foreldrene skulle skille seg, men turte aldri å si det høyt selvfølgelig. Har kuttet kontakten med han i voksen alder og går i terapi. Kjenner flere som hadde klart seg bedre uten faren i bildet, så dette spørs nok helt på faren det gitt 😉 Her lukter det i grunnen litt bitterhet og kvinnefiendtlig..

Anonymkode: 5d690...b12

[absinthia]

20 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

 

Infants of highly involved fathers, as measured by amount of interaction, including higher levels of play and caregiving activities, are more cognitively competent at 6 months and score higher on the Bayley Scales of Infant Development (Pedersen, Rubinstein, & Yarrow, 1979; Pedersen, Anderson, & Kain, 1980). By one year they continue to have higher cognitive functioning (Nugent, 1991), are better problem solvers as toddlers (Easterbrooks & Goldberg, 1984), and have higher IQ’s by age three (Yogman, Kindlan, & Earls, 1995). When compared with mothers, fathers’ talk with toddlers is characterized by more wh- (e.g. “what”, where” etc.) questions, which requires children to assume more communicative responsibility in the interaction. This encouraged toddlers to talk more, use more diverse vocabulary, and produce longer utterances when interacting with their fathers (Rowe, Cocker, & Pan, 2004).

School aged children of involved fathers are also better academic achievers. They are more likely to get A’s (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001), have better quantitative and verbal skills (Bing, 1963; Goldstein, 1982; Radin, 1982), have higher grade point averages, get better achievement test scores, receive superior grades, perform a year above their expected age level on academic tests, obtain higher scores on reading achievement, or learn more and perform better in school (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Blanchard & Biller, 1971; Cooksey & Fondell, 1996; Feldman & Wentzel, 1990; Gadsen & Ray, 2003; Goldstein, 1982; Gottfried, Gottfried, & Bathurst, 1988; Howard, Lefever, Borkowski, & Whitman, 2006; McBride et al., 2005; McBride, Schoppe-Sullivan, & 2005; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Shinn, 1978; Snarey 1993; Wentzel & Feldman, 1993). Children of involved fathers are also more likely to live in cognitively stimulating homes (William, 1997). A father’s academic support was positively related to adolescent boys’ academic motivation to try hard in school, feel their grades were important, and to place a high value on education (Alfaro, Umana-Taylor, & Bamaca, 2006). Father contact was also associated with better socioemotional and academic functioning in school related areas for children with single or married adolescent mothers (Howard et al., 2006).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to demonstrate more cognitive competence on standardized intellectual assessments (Lamb 1987; Radin 1994) and have higher IQ’s (Gottfried et al., 1988; Honzik, 1967; Radin 1972; Shinn, 1978).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to enjoy school (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997), have positive attitudes toward school (Flouri, Buchanan, & Bream, 2002; Flouri, 2005), participate in extracurricular activities, and graduate. They are also less likely to fail a grade, have poor attendance, be suspended or expelled, or have behaviour problems at school, (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Brown & Rife, 1991; Mosley & Thompson, 1995; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001; William, 1997). In addition, Zimmerman, Slaem, and Notaro (2000) found that positive paternal engagement in 10th grade predicted fewer problem behaviors in 11th grade.

Children of involved fathers are more likely to have higher levels of economic and educational achievement, career success, occupational competency, better educational outcomes, higher educational expectations, higher educational attainment, and psychological well being (Amato, 1994; Barber & Thomas, 1986; Barnett, Marshall, & Pleck, 1992a; Bell, 1969; Flouri, 2005; Furstenberg & Harris, 1993; Harris, Furstenberg, & Marmer, 1998; Lozoff, 1974; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Snarey, 1993). More recently, Flouri and Buchanan (2004) found that father and mother involvement at age 7 independently predicted educational attainment by age 20 for both sons and daughters indicating that early father involvement can be another protective factor in counteracting risk conditions that might lead to later low attainment levels.
http://www.fira.ca/cms/documents/29/Effects_of_Father_Involvement.pdf

Det er ekstremt viktig for barn å ha en far. Faktisk viser det seg at faren er viktigere for barnas utvikling enn moren er. Kanskje fordi moren bare er opptatt av følelser, i mens menn er mer opptatt av prestasjon? Uansett vil det være skadelig for barn å vokse opp med en alenemor. 

Anonymkode: b9d3f...9c3

Har du sjekket hvordan barn av alenefedre uten en involvert mor har det? Dette handler jo om barn med en omsorgsperson, kontra to omsorgspersoner. 

Ellers er det slik at de fleste fedre er nogenlunde engasjerte i barna, selv om de ikke er i et forhold til barnets mor. 

Å være alenemor er ingen katastrofe. 

Endret 10. oktober 2018 av absinthia

[AnonymBruker]

Nei. Klarer ikke tenke at mannen kan gjøre det mot hverken meg eller barna. 

Anonymkode: 30c89...f04

[AnonymBruker]

17 minutter siden, AnonymBruker skrev:

 

Infants of highly involved fathers, as measured by amount of interaction, including higher levels of play and caregiving activities, are more cognitively competent at 6 months and score higher on the Bayley Scales of Infant Development (Pedersen, Rubinstein, & Yarrow, 1979; Pedersen, Anderson, & Kain, 1980). By one year they continue to have higher cognitive functioning (Nugent, 1991), are better problem solvers as toddlers (Easterbrooks & Goldberg, 1984), and have higher IQ’s by age three (Yogman, Kindlan, & Earls, 1995). When compared with mothers, fathers’ talk with toddlers is characterized by more wh- (e.g. “what”, where” etc.) questions, which requires children to assume more communicative responsibility in the interaction. This encouraged toddlers to talk more, use more diverse vocabulary, and produce longer utterances when interacting with their fathers (Rowe, Cocker, & Pan, 2004).

School aged children of involved fathers are also better academic achievers. They are more likely to get A’s (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001), have better quantitative and verbal skills (Bing, 1963; Goldstein, 1982; Radin, 1982), have higher grade point averages, get better achievement test scores, receive superior grades, perform a year above their expected age level on academic tests, obtain higher scores on reading achievement, or learn more and perform better in school (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Blanchard & Biller, 1971; Cooksey & Fondell, 1996; Feldman & Wentzel, 1990; Gadsen & Ray, 2003; Goldstein, 1982; Gottfried, Gottfried, & Bathurst, 1988; Howard, Lefever, Borkowski, & Whitman, 2006; McBride et al., 2005; McBride, Schoppe-Sullivan, & 2005; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Shinn, 1978; Snarey 1993; Wentzel & Feldman, 1993). Children of involved fathers are also more likely to live in cognitively stimulating homes (William, 1997). A father’s academic support was positively related to adolescent boys’ academic motivation to try hard in school, feel their grades were important, and to place a high value on education (Alfaro, Umana-Taylor, & Bamaca, 2006). Father contact was also associated with better socioemotional and academic functioning in school related areas for children with single or married adolescent mothers (Howard et al., 2006).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to demonstrate more cognitive competence on standardized intellectual assessments (Lamb 1987; Radin 1994) and have higher IQ’s (Gottfried et al., 1988; Honzik, 1967; Radin 1972; Shinn, 1978).

Children of involved fathers are more likely to enjoy school (National Center for Education Statistics, 1997), have positive attitudes toward school (Flouri, Buchanan, & Bream, 2002; Flouri, 2005), participate in extracurricular activities, and graduate. They are also less likely to fail a grade, have poor attendance, be suspended or expelled, or have behaviour problems at school, (Astone & McLanahan, 1991; Brown & Rife, 1991; Mosley & Thompson, 1995; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Nord & West, 2001; William, 1997). In addition, Zimmerman, Slaem, and Notaro (2000) found that positive paternal engagement in 10th grade predicted fewer problem behaviors in 11th grade.

Children of involved fathers are more likely to have higher levels of economic and educational achievement, career success, occupational competency, better educational outcomes, higher educational expectations, higher educational attainment, and psychological well being (Amato, 1994; Barber & Thomas, 1986; Barnett, Marshall, & Pleck, 1992a; Bell, 1969; Flouri, 2005; Furstenberg & Harris, 1993; Harris, Furstenberg, & Marmer, 1998; Lozoff, 1974; National Center for Education Statistics, 1997; Snarey, 1993). More recently, Flouri and Buchanan (2004) found that father and mother involvement at age 7 independently predicted educational attainment by age 20 for both sons and daughters indicating that early father involvement can be another protective factor in counteracting risk conditions that might lead to later low attainment levels.
http://www.fira.ca/cms/documents/29/Effects_of_Father_Involvement.pdf

Det er ekstremt viktig for barn å ha en far. Faktisk viser det seg at faren er viktigere for barnas utvikling enn moren er. Kanskje fordi moren bare er opptatt av følelser, i mens menn er mer opptatt av prestasjon? Uansett vil det være skadelig for barn å vokse opp med en alenemor. 

Anonymkode: b9d3f...9c3

Og mødre er bare opptatt av følelser!? 🤦🏻‍♀️ Du er ingen kvinne, for å si det sånn 🙂 Du vet at vi til og med har kvinnelig statsminister nå, som også er mor? Idrettsutøvere, ledere og gründere? De fikk til dette gjennom følelser de da, det er jo toppers 😁👌🏻 Og at flere både suksessfulle  og kjente mennesker har gått ut med at de har vokst opp med bare mor 😉 Enig i at det er best med både far og mor hvis ting tillater det altså, men denne ble litt drøy og useriøs 😉

Anonymkode: 5d690...b12

[AnonymBruker]

Nei jeg har ikke angst for det. En vet at en alltids vil klare seg. 

Anonymkode: d3f08...f22