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Tibbie

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Hei!

Jeg har en viktig jobb foran meg, hvor jeg skal skrive flere artikler på engelsk. Det er derfor da veldig viktig for meg at alt er riktig gramatisk og formulert på best mulig måte.

Derfor lurer jeg på om noen som er dyktig på språket kan titte rask gjennom min første artikkel, og nevne alle skrivefeil de legger merke til?

Tar også i mot forslag til omformuleringer!

Det hadde virkelig hjulpet meg ut om noen kunne gjøre meg denne tjenesten :)

:blomst: :blomst:

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Fortsetter under...

Her er artikkelen:

Amnesty International is a worldwide human right organization that is politically independent and does not receive any state funding. The organization is dreaming and working for a world where the basic human rights is fulfilled for everyone. They exist because of abuse of power, for those who get suppressed, imprisoned, loses their right for school and health services or being pursued.

Amnesty has contributed to changing a lot of countries discriminating laws as well as releasing innocent prisoners from death row.

I've been an activist for Amnesty in Norway since they fought for Troy Davis in 2011. When I heard about Troy Davis' story, I got extremely provoked and suddenly engaged in his cause. Davis sat on death row for 22 years, and got most likely executed innocent. He got accused of killing Mark MacPhail who was a police man. There were many witnesses who said they've seen Troy Davis shoot MacPhail, while two other people said Davis confessed to them about the murder.

The murder weapon was never found, and there were no physical evidence.

Seven of the nine witnesses withdrew their statements and many implied that the police pushed them to witness against Troy Davis. Others, who didn't testify before the judgment fell, has subsequently said there was another man fire that gun. Troy got executed with a lethal injection september 22, 2011 in Georgia, USA.

My work in Amnesty will be one of the things I'll be writing about in this blog. Last thursday I attended a course about the four main campaigns the organization will work with in 2013. They are about rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, gay rights, and death penalty which will be the main campaign. Every time I attend one of Amnesty's courses they have some new shocking stories that inspires us to work even harder.

One of the stories they talked about on the course on thursday were about Raif Badawi from Saudi-Arabia, who is the creator and blogger for the website “Saudi Arabian Liberals”, which was meant for political and social debates. He was arrested on 17 June 2012 on a charge of insulting Islam through his website. He got a conviction which might carry a death sentence. The indictment points to a series of articles he has written. One of them was about Valentine's Day, which is forbidden in Saudi-Arabia. Amnesty International considers Raif Badawi as a prisoner of conscience, imprisoned for the use of speech.

I am very excited to fight for people like Badawi, and to share Amnesty's work with the readers of this blog. Who knows, maybe you'll get inspired and work with Amnesty International as well?

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* is dreaming of

*lose, ikke loses?

I den samme setningen skal det også være komma, i tillegg til at den siste vendingen ikke høres helt god ut.

*to change

*omskriving: and most likely, he was executed for a crime he didn't commit/ most likely, he was an innocent put to death eller lignende.

*who fired the gun

*Thursday med stor t

*ville delt opp setningen der du ramser opp kampanjene. ..and gay rights. Death penalty will be the.. osv

Innspill, jeg er ikke særlig god, men håper det var til litt hjelp likevel.

Anonym poster: 79ca07049f662e3d3b4f5d6d94439cfb

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Her er artikkelen:

Amnesty International is a worldwide human right organization that is politically independent and does not receive any state funding. The organization is dreaming and working for a world where the basic human rights are fulfilled for everyone. They exist because of abuse of power, for those who get suppressed, imprisoned, lose their right for school and health services or being pursued.

Amnesty has contributed to change the discriminating laws of several countries, as well as releasing innocent prisoners from death row.

I've been an activist for Amnesty in Norway since they fought for Troy Davis in 2011. When I heard about Troy Davis' story, I got extremely provoked and suddenly engaged in his cause. Davis sat on death row for 22 years, and was most likely executed innocent. He was accused of killing Mark MacPhail, a police man. There were many witnesses who said they've seen Troy Davis shoot MacPhail, while two other people said Davis confessed to them about the murder.

The murder weapon was never found, and there was no physical evidence.

Seven of the nine witnesses withdrew their statements and many implied that the police pushed them to witness against Troy Davis. Others, who didn't testify before the judgment fell, has subsequently said there was another man firing that gun. Troy got executed with a lethal injection on September 22, 2011 in Georgia, USA.

My work in Amnesty will be one of the things I'll be writing about in this blog. Last thursday I attended a course about the four main campaigns the organization will work with in 2013. They are about rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, gay rights, and death penalty which will be the main campaign. Every time I attend one of Amnesty's courses they have some new shocking stories that inspire us to work even harder.

One of the stories they talked about on the course on Thursday was about Raif Badawi from Saudi-Arabia, who is the creator and blogger for the website “Saudi Arabian Liberals”, which was meant for political and social debates. He was arrested on 17 June 2012 on a charge of insulting Islam through his website. He got a conviction which might carry a death sentence. The indictment points to a series of articles he has written. One of them was about Valentine's Day, which is forbidden in Saudi-Arabia. Amnesty International considers Raif Badawi as a prisoner of conscience, imprisoned for the use of speech.

I am very excited to fight for people like Badawi, and to share Amnesty's work with the readers of this blog. Who knows, maybe you'll get inspired and work with Amnesty International as well?

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Humans rights organization. Ville absolutt ikke brukt "dreaming" i denne konteksten. "to help those that are suppressed (etc)", "their rights to education (etc)", "countries' discriminating laws", ville ikke skrevet at du "suddenly" ble engasjert, heller bare engasjert, "was most likely/most likely got", ikke "got most likely", også viktig at du skriver "even though he was innocent" eller lignende, ikke bare "executed innocent".

"He was accused of murdering Mark Macphail, a police man."

"said there was another man fire that gun" blir helt feil. "said somebody else shot him/fired the gun" e.l. blir mer riktig.

"Troy WAS executed"

"The main campaign will focus on the death penalty, the other campaigns will focus on rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, and gay rights."

"that inspire us", ikke "inspires".

På engelsk kommer måned først, så dag, så år. F.eks. June 17, 2012.

Alt blir ikke perfekt med disse endringene, er blant annet noen grammatiske feil jeg ikke har orket å kommentere, men du får i alle fall fikset opp i de groveste feilene. :)

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

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Du vet at læreren din kan ha et enkelt sporingsprogram som gjør at h*n kan finne ut om artikkelen allerede er skrevet av noen andre? Da vil jo læreren din se at du har vært her inne for å få hjelp.

Anonym poster: c723675bff9feeb0de8c20712b3ffee8

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* is dreaming of

*lose, ikke loses?

I den samme setningen skal det også være komma, i tillegg til at den siste vendingen ikke høres helt god ut.

*to change

*omskriving: and most likely, he was executed for a crime he didn't commit/ most likely, he was an innocent put to death eller lignende.

*who fired the gun

*Thursday med stor t

*ville delt opp setningen der du ramser opp kampanjene. ..and gay rights. Death penalty will be the.. osv

Innspill, jeg er ikke særlig god, men håper det var til litt hjelp likevel.

Anonym poster: 79ca07049f662e3d3b4f5d6d94439cfb

Humans rights organization. Ville absolutt ikke brukt "dreaming" i denne konteksten. "to help those that are suppressed (etc)", "their rights to education (etc)", "countries' discriminating laws", ville ikke skrevet at du "suddenly" ble engasjert, heller bare engasjert, "was most likely/most likely got", ikke "got most likely", også viktig at du skriver "even though he was innocent" eller lignende, ikke bare "executed innocent".

"He was accused of murdering Mark Macphail, a police man."

"said there was another man fire that gun" blir helt feil. "said somebody else shot him/fired the gun" e.l. blir mer riktig.

"Troy WAS executed"

"The main campaign will focus on the death penalty, the other campaigns will focus on rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, and gay rights."

"that inspire us", ikke "inspires".

På engelsk kommer måned først, så dag, så år. F.eks. June 17, 2012.

Alt blir ikke perfekt med disse endringene, er blant annet noen grammatiske feil jeg ikke har orket å kommentere, men du får i alle fall fikset opp i de groveste feilene. :)

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

TUSEN TAKK for at dere orket å ta dere tid til å hjelpe meg med dette!! Setter virkelig pris på det :)

Du vet at læreren din kan ha et enkelt sporingsprogram som gjør at h*n kan finne ut om artikkelen allerede er skrevet av noen andre? Da vil jo læreren din se at du har vært her inne for å få hjelp.

Anonym poster: c723675bff9feeb0de8c20712b3ffee8

Dette er ikke lekser eller noe som skal leveres inn til lærer, men jeg tenker å slette dette etterhvert for sikkerhetsskyld :) Vil ikke bli anklaget for plagiat!

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Så at et par av rettelsene mine ikke ble helt tydelige. Skal være ' etter countries, altså countries', for å vise at det er landene sine lover, ikke bare land i flertall.

Skal selvfølgelig være MacPhail med stor P, slik du skrev det, men . Har noen skrivefeil selv midt på natta. :) Men du bør absolutt omformulere setning slik jeg skrev ("He was accused of murdering Mark MacPhail, a police man.").

Ellers er det også stor bokstav ved navn på ukedager, og "lose their rights (to education etc.)" slik andre har skrevet.

I tillegg bør du omformulere "got a conviction" til "was convicted".

Lykke til, hyggelig å kunne hjelpe (til tross for trøtthet)!

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

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Vet noen forresten om et gratis retteprogram online jeg kan kjøre dette gjennom? Har uheldigvis ikke det i skriveprogrammet på mac'en :(

Anonym poster: 79ca07049f662e3d3b4f5d6d94439cfb

Anonym poster: c723675bff9feeb0de8c20712b3ffee8

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

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Mange retteprogrammer er dårlige, og kan således ødelegge like mye som de hjelper. Googlet det og fant et program. Det var ikke særlig hjelpsomt, jeg kopierte inn en del av teksten din med klare feil, og den eneste feilen programmet påpekte var "MacPhail".

(Så forresten av det ble et par ufullstendige setninger i forrige innlegg... Håper det kan trøste deg, TS, at jeg er bedre i engelsk enn i norsk. :fnise: )

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

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Så at et par av rettelsene mine ikke ble helt tydelige. Skal være ' etter countries, altså countries', for å vise at det er landene sine lover, ikke bare land i flertall.

Skal selvfølgelig være MacPhail med stor P, slik du skrev det, men . Har noen skrivefeil selv midt på natta. :) Men du bør absolutt omformulere setning slik jeg skrev ("He was accused of murdering Mark MacPhail, a police man.").

Ellers er det også stor bokstav ved navn på ukedager, og "lose their rights (to education etc.)" slik andre har skrevet.

I tillegg bør du omformulere "got a conviction" til "was convicted".

Lykke til, hyggelig å kunne hjelpe (til tross for trøtthet)!

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

Ja, jeg brukte omformuleringen din om "the police man". Jeg ble også lettet over å få et forslag på omformulering av oppramsingen av kampanjene. Det var en tung setning jeg slet med å forbedre. Så TAKK for det!! :)

Mange retteprogrammer er dårlige, og kan således ødelegge like mye som de hjelper. Googlet det og fant et program. Det var ikke særlig hjelpsomt, jeg kopierte inn en del av teksten din med klare feil, og den eneste feilen programmet påpekte var "MacPhail".

(Så forresten av det ble et par ufullstendige setninger i forrige innlegg... Håper det kan trøste deg, TS, at jeg er bedre i engelsk enn i norsk. :fnise: )

Anonym poster: d0f9516e8bfe635eb065d0a2e69d705f

Ååh, haha. Samme som det jeg har i skriveprogrammet mitt. Hater når jeg kun får røde streker på navn :P Jeg takker igjen for hjelpen. Ser jeg må lære meg "was"-regelen, det er vell den skrivefeilen som blir gjenntatt mest her! Hehe

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Vet noen forresten om et gratis retteprogram online jeg kan kjøre dette gjennom? Har uheldigvis ikke det i skriveprogrammet på mac'en :(

Du kan legge til stavekontroll i nettleseren din, da er det bare å kopiere teksten inn i et hvilket som helst tekstfelt på en nettside (feks her på KG, eller i mailen din) og bevege markøren gjennom teksten med piltastene, så vil det poppe opp røde streker under feilstavede ord :) Ikke at du egentlig trenger det - rettskrivingen din er strålende :)

Legger ved mine forslag til omformulering - sier ikke at du trenger å skrive det slik, det er bare slik jeg selv ville foretrukket:

Her er artikkelen:

Amnesty International is a worldwide human right organization that is politically independent and does not receive any state funding.

Amnesty International is a global and politically independent human rights organisation that does not receive state funding.

The organization is dreaming and working for a world where the basic human rights is fulfilled for everyone. They exist because of abuse of power, for those who get suppressed, imprisoned, loses their right for school and health services or being pursued.

One of the main aims of this organisation is contributing to a world where basic human rights applies to all. (evt kan man kanskje si "where basic human rights are legislated"? Dersom det er lovfestede menneskerettigheter de ønsker, mener jeg) They exist to fight abuse of power, to support those who are oppressed, imprisoned, lacking rights to education or health care, or those being pursued (by whom? Altså, hvem er forfølger? Mener du politiske flyktninger?)

Amnesty has contributed to changing a lot of countries discriminating laws as well as releasing innocent prisoners from death row.

Amnesty have contributed to several countries changing their laws to eliminate discrimination, as well as having innocent prisoners released from death row.

I've been an activist for Amnesty in Norway since they fought for Troy Davis in 2011. When I heard about Troy Davis' story, I got extremely provoked and suddenly engaged in his cause. Davis sat on death row for 22 years, and got most likely executed innocent.

I have (når alt annet i teksten er formelt er det greit å holde linja :) ) been an activist for the Norwegian branch of Amnesty International since the campaign to free Troy Davis in 2011. When I heard Troy Davis' story, I was extremely provoked and felt compelled to get involved in this cause. Davis sat on death row for 22 years, and was ultimately executed, despite most likely being innocent.

He got accused of killing Mark MacPhail who was a police man. There were many witnesses who said they've seen Troy Davis shoot MacPhail, while two other people said Davis confessed to them about the murder.

He was accused of murdering Mark MacPhail, who was a police officer. There were many witnesses who claimed they had seen Troy Davis shoot MacPhail, while two other witnesses claimed Davis had confessed the murder to them.

The murder weapon was never found, and there were no physical evidence.

Seven of the nine witnesses withdrew their statements and many implied that the police pushed them to witness against Troy Davis. Others, who didn't testify before the judgment fell, has subsequently said there was another man fire that gun. Troy got executed with a lethal injection september 22, 2011 in Georgia, USA.

Seven of the nine witnesses withdrew their statements, and there were implications that the police had pressured them to testify against Troy Davis. Others, who did not testify prior to Davis' conviction, has later claimed that another man fired the shot that murdered MacPhail. Davis was executed by means of a lethal injection on the 22nd of September 2011 in Georgia, USA.

My work in Amnesty will be one of the things I'll be writing about in this blog. Last thursday I attended a course about the four main campaigns the organization will work with in 2013. They are about rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, gay rights, and death penalty which will be the main campaign. Every time I attend one of Amnesty's courses they have some new shocking stories that inspires us to work even harder.

One of the (main?) topics for this blog will be my work with Amnesty International. Last Thursday, I attended a seminar about the four main campaigns this organisation will focus on in 2013. The main campaign will be on death penalties, furthermore there are campaigns against rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa (OBS! bør kun skrives slik dersom det er snakk om voldtekter i alle tre områdene) as well as working for gay rights. Every time I attend one of Amnesty's seminars, I am presented with even more shocking realities, that inspire me to work even harder.

One of the stories they talked about on the course on thursday were about Raif Badawi from Saudi-Arabia, who is the creator and blogger for the website “Saudi Arabian Liberals”, which was meant for political and social debates.

On Thursday's seminar, I learned about Raif Badawi from Saudi-Arabia, who is the creator of the website "Saudi Arabian Liberals" on which he also writes blog posts. This website was intended for political and social debate.

He was arrested on the 17th of June 2012 on a charge of insulting Islam through his website. He got a conviction which might carry a death sentence. The indictment points to a series of articles he has written. One of them was about Valentine's Day, which is forbidden in Saudi-Arabia. Amnesty International considers Raif Badawi as a prisoner of conscience, imprisoned for the use of speech.

I am very excited to fight for people like Badawi, and to share Amnesty's work with the readers of this blog. Who knows, maybe you'll get inspired and work with Amnesty International as well?

I am very passionate about fighting for people like Badawi, and to share the work of Amnesty with the readers of this blog. Who knows, maybe you will be inspired to work with Amnesty International as well?

Anonym poster: 23d37ffa5aa2cd88fca544858215a13f

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Du kan legge til stavekontroll i nettleseren din, da er det bare å kopiere teksten inn i et hvilket som helst tekstfelt på en nettside (feks her på KG, eller i mailen din) og bevege markøren gjennom teksten med piltastene, så vil det poppe opp røde streker under feilstavede ord :) Ikke at du egentlig trenger det - rettskrivingen din er strålende :)

Legger ved mine forslag til omformulering - sier ikke at du trenger å skrive det slik, det er bare slik jeg selv ville foretrukket:

Anonym poster: 23d37ffa5aa2cd88fca544858215a13f

Ja, jeg kom på det etterpå. Jeg testet det ut etter jeg brukte all rettingen dere hjalp meg med, og det ble ingen røde streker (sett bort fra navnene)!! :D

Tusen, tusen takk!! Jeg likte at du brukte seminar i stedet for kurs! :blomst::danse:

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Stavekontrollen funker fint på min Mac iallfall. Skriv dokumentet inn i Word og velg engelsk som språk, så vil du få røde streker (feilstavede ord) og grønne streker (feil grammatikk).

Men du har fått massevis av god hjelp her. Det eneste jeg tenkte å legge til er at det enten heter policeman (i ett ord) eller police officer (i to), men jeg ser også at det allerede er en som har foreslått den siste varianten.

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Dette er ikke lekser eller noe som skal leveres inn til lærer, men jeg tenker å slette dette etterhvert for sikkerhetsskyld :) Vil ikke bli anklaget for plagiat!

Hvordan skal du kunne slette andre folks innlegg i tråden som siterer alt du skriver?

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Stavekontrollen funker fint på min Mac iallfall. Skriv dokumentet inn i Word og velg engelsk som språk, så vil du få røde streker (feilstavede ord) og grønne streker (feil grammatikk).

Men du har fått massevis av god hjelp her. Det eneste jeg tenkte å legge til er at det enten heter policeman (i ett ord) eller police officer (i to), men jeg ser også at det allerede er en som har foreslått den siste varianten.

Jeg har ikke Word på Mac'en min. Jeg bruker OpenOffice og har ikke kjøpt retteprogram med det :/

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Hvordan skal du kunne slette andre folks innlegg i tråden som siterer alt du skriver?

Nei, jeg tenker å slette alt. Folk som leser dette innlegget der det skal ligge, vet ikke at Tibbie på KG er meg. Derfor kan de tro jeg jeg kopiert det Tibbie skrev ;)

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Den var ikke så verst, men jeg har kommet med forslag til omskrivninger og litt rettelser. Har sikkert oversett noe, så min utgave er heller ikke perfekt.

Her er artikkelen:

Amnesty International is a worldwide human right organization that is politically independent and does not receive any state funding. ( Amnesty International is a politically independent human rights organization)The organization is dreaming and working for a world where the basic human rights is fulfilled for everyone. (The organization works towards/aspires for/aims for a world where basic human rights are fulfilled for everyone) They exist because of abuse of power, for those who get suppressed, imprisoned, loses their right for school and health services or being pursued. (Among other things he organization works to improve the rights of those who get suppressed, get pursued without a cause and those who lack proper health services.)

Amnesty has contributed to changing a lot of countries discriminating laws as well as releasing innocent prisoners from death row. (Countries' ikke countries.)

I've been an activist for Amnesty in Norway since they fought for Troy Davis in 2011. (Amnesty Norway, ikke Amnesty in Norway) When I heard about Troy Davis' story, I got extremely provoked and suddenly engaged in his cause. Davis sat on death row for 22 years, and got most likely executed innocent (and was most likely an innocent victim of the death penalty.). He got accused of killing Mark MacPhail who was a police man.(He was accused of killing policeman Mark MacPhail) There were many witnesses who said they've seen Troy Davis shoot MacPhail, while two other people said Davis confessed to them about the murder. (Ville brukt claimes istedenfor said)

The murder weapon was never found, and there were no physical evidence. (Was ikke were)

Seven of the nine witnesses withdrew their statements and many implied that the police pushed them to witness against Troy Davis. Others, who didn't testify before the judgment fell, has subsequently said there was another man fire that gun. Troy got executed with a lethal injection september 22, 2011 in Georgia, USA. ( Måneder skrives med stor forbokstav på englesk)

My work in Amnesty will be one of the things I'll be writing about in this blog. (My work for Amesty ikke my work in) Last thursday I attended a course about the four main campaigns the organization will work with in 2013. (Last Thursday I attended a seminar about the four main campaigns the organization will be working on in 2013, rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, gays' rights and the death penalty) They are about rape in Norway, the Middle East and North Africa, gay rights, and death penalty which will be the main campaign. Every time I attend one of Amnesty's courses they have some new shocking stories that inspires us to work even harder. (Each time I attend one of their seminars I hear new shocking stories that inspires of to work even harder.)

One of the stories they talked about on the course on thursday were about Raif Badawi from Saudi-Arabia, who is the creator and blogger for the website “Saudi Arabian Liberals”, which was meant for political and social debates. (One of the stories they talked about at the seminar on Thursday was about Saudi-Arabian Raif Badawi. A creator and blogger for the website "Saudi-Arabian Liberals" He was arrested on 17 June 2012 on a charge of insulting Islam through his website. He got a conviction which might carry a death sentence. The indictment points to a series of articles he has written. One of them was about Valentine's Day, which is forbidden in Saudi Arabia. Amnesty International considers Raif Badawi as a prisoner of conscience, imprisoned for the use of speech.

I am very excited to fight for people like Badawi, and to share Amnesty's work with the readers of this blog. Who knows, maybe you'll get inspired and work with Amnesty International as well?

Anonym poster: e3739eedd47114ca0da48af5ad80f136

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Jeg synes ikke den var så aller verst, men den var litt hakkete formulert og du hadde en del småfeil. Se forslag til ny og forbedret tekst her:

Amnesty International exist do to the abuse of power and violation of human rights. The movement is a political independent human rights organization that aims to fulfill basic human rights for everyone. They fight for those who get suppressed, innocently sentenced to prison and those who are innocently pursued.

The movement has contributed to changing the discrimination laws of several countries and has played a role in releasing innocent victims on death row.

I have been an activist for Amnesty Norway since 2011, when they fought for Troy Davies, who was most likely an innocent victim of the death penalty. He was accused of shooting and killing police officer Mark MacPhail, and even though there was no clear evidence he was was the killer. Davis was executed on September 11th 2011, in Georgia, USA.

Last Thursday I attended a seminar about the organization's four main campaigns in 2013, rape in Norway, gays' rights, the death penalty and the Middle East and North Africa.

Each time I attend one of their seminars I learn new shocking stories about human rights being violated. Stories that inspires me to work even harder.

Last Thursday I learned about the Saudi-Arabian creator of the website "Saudi-Arabian Liberals" Raif Badawi. On June 17th 2012, Badawi was arrested for violation Islam with a blog post about Valentine's Day, a holiday that is forbidden in Saudi Arabia.

To Amnesty International Badawi is considered a prisoner of conscience, imprisoned for the use of free speech.

I am very passionate about working for Amnesty and to share their work through this blog. Hopefully it will inspire you to work with Amnesty International as well!

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