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[Mann 42]

So I had this dream last night. Scientists discovered that doughnuts are naturally occurring phenomena. Under the right circumstances, doughnuts will exist in any environment. The size, shape, & flavor of the doughnut is determined by its element's position on the periodic table. For example: the standard ringed cake doughnut is a result of the element beryllium, and molybdenum will produce various barred doughnuts. The glaze of a doughnut is determined by an element's isotopic value and can be calculated and predicted. By simply adding or removing neutrons from the nucleus of an atom, we can manipulate the outward flavor of our doughnut. A terrifying consequence of this discovery was the unintentional creation of a dangerously unstable bacon-maple bar. The likes of which contains the destructive force of every bomb ever constructed...combined. Though the research was kept secret, several warring nations have begun experimenting with weaponized crullers, dirty jelly-fills, & worse... pastries of ultimate mass destruction.